De incident wiv de knickers and de man fwom BT!

KNICKERS GALORE!

KNICKERS GALORE!

Hello efuryone Hawwy here Well I had a visit to de house yesterday fwom not one but two vewy vewy nice men. Well I say nice de second one was a bit gwumpy but de I did get ofur excited and pee on his boots but dats anofur story and a little emabarssing. I blame de cold air and lack of fur round me back end due to me operations and me mum goin loony wiv de clippers (yoo will understand dis if yoo has bought me book). Anyway, back to de story. So two vans pulled up mum said dey were fwom BT to put a new phone in de house. Yoo see we has just moved to Devonia and whilst der is one line in which is a business line we needed a home number too appawently. All incwedibly borin if yoo ask me and I wish I had not asked at all! So I gots all excited as above and was woofin and howlin and Maggie me sisfur was followin me lead (no pun intended) After de incident wiv de peeing on de mans boot, I felt I shood weally make an effort to makes fweinds wiv him agin and show him dat I is weally a nice dog and dat de barkin, howlin and den peein on him was weally just me bein pleased to meet him. So…….. I thought “I know I bwing him a gift” Now wot gift wood yoo take someone yoo peed on? I thought about takin him a tennis ball but dey is mine and I share dem wiv no-one peed on or not peed on. I went and got a pully toy but Maggie gwabbed de end of it and whilst it was temptin to take her to him as a gift and have de hoomin affections and wuv to meself I don’t fink me hoomins would be happy and she had already jumped up at him and make him go “ooooof”! Somefin to do wiv crown jewels not sure. Now second in command (mama) had bin doin somefin wiv washin in de utility woom and she had stoopidly left a basket on de floor as she had got distwacted by de woofing and oooofing and peeing. I seized my opportunity. What better gift to give a stwange man dat I had peed on than somefin belongin to me hoomins. After all I is der dog so dey should pay a penalty too! So I snuffled in de basket “socks nah too boring, sheets too big, t-shirt no I always twip on dem…..aha!!!” der it was de jewel in de basket de pawfect gift fur de man. I gwabbed de gift in me mouth and went off to find him. Luckily he was outside so I went up to him clutching his gift and gave it too him. He took it gently fwom me mouth and said good boy. Den he wealised what it was! Well second in command came out wiv a cuppa tea fur him and his mate to find him stood der clutching his gift fwom me………. a wuvly paif of boss mums knickers. De man went vewy red and second in command looked shocked. De man twied to explain as best he could wot had happened as he gingerly handed dem back to second in command who was also bwight red at dis point. She twied to explain dat I was always taken stuff fwom de washin basket. Needless to say I gots dragged inside and all fur given wot I fink was de pawfect gift to someone I had barked and peed on. I don’t get hoomins at all but I guess us dogs are all fur and no knickers! Lots of wuv Hawwy xxxxx

Knicker thief

Knicker thief

6 thoughts on “De incident wiv de knickers and de man fwom BT!

  1. Bwahahahaha…that is totally hilarious….best laugh in ages! I can just picture the expresions on the hoomins’ faces!!! xxxx

  2. Oh Harry, how could anyone not find that funny, poor ‘second in command’ though, BOL, BOL, BOL, xxxxxxxxxxx

  3. BOL!!!! Now I’z gotta show dis too momma cuz Iz got yelled at before fur pulling tings wike datz outta da laundwy basket, but at weast I’z not gib it to nobodyz! Dat funnyz, Hawwy!

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